Judgement seems to be a thing that I find myself occasionally caught up in, and that I have experienced when interacting with others. Where does judgement come from?
The word judgement means the ability to come to a sensible conclusion. When you change the word to judgmental, it indicates a critical and condemning view. Wow!
How can a tendency toward being judgmental be worked with?
I am re-reading Byron Katie’s book “Loving What Is”. She has a quote from the Greek philosopher, Epictetus…. “We are disturbed not by what happens to us, but by our thoughts about what happens.” This says to me that what we think about a situation may not be what really happened…. Mmmmmmm. Is judgement about our reaction to these thoughts and not the truth of the reality of the event?
Check out The Work of Byron Katie
There are four questions that are asked in The Work.
- Is it true?
- Can you absolutely know that it’s true?
- How do you react when you think this thought?
- Who would you be without the thought?
Notice that the questions are having you examine your thoughts and the way you are thinking.
I believe that suffering happens when our thinking conflicts with what is true, and when we want more than anything to believe our thinking and the thoughts that come from the thinking.
How can thoughts and thinking be changed?
My experience has taught me that I need to go where I am the only one who has responsibility… inside with myself. This is where I have 100% control. I am staying in my own business. I am doing me and me only or as I have heard recently… I am staying in my own lane.
Once inside, I tend to use the first question… Is it true? From there I stay mindful of my thoughts and of judgmental energy showing up. I need to be truthful with myself especially since it is just me that is present. No hiding the truth. By the time I am done the resolution is clear. I get to decide if I am going to act upon it.
Do you stay in your own lane?
Big Hugs and Much Love,